The Crowd Without Launch

So, the Flax018 launch came and went. Just like that. It was a great night. Download the anthology on the Flax page, and you can follow links to audio recordings and other content.

The other 5 poets were awesome and I was fully in awe of the confidence and the sheer performance. I just got up, read and sat down. This was however, my first time. In fact a lot of firsts: first time I'd ever submitted anything for publication, therefore first time I have been accepted, and first time to air it to the general public. I've only been writing for about a year, a bit less in fact, so all told it wasn't a bad job, but I still felt very conspicuous. I realised quite soon after the event, that it is not my destiny to be a performance poet. I write to be read but I would happily just read it and then leave. I'm not good at the drama, and the body language. I also feel happier letting the audience read their own meaning. I don't like explaining things outside the safe boundaries of the poem itself. I wonder if this is okay?

So what actually happened: well, I was third in line (of 6) and read four poems. Three from the anthology and one short one from no where in particular. It was exciting to see the promo postcards and I took some away for posterity. I also put my fourth poem on to travel tags and left them on tables for people to take away (see photo). These were fun to make but I didn't hang around until the end to see if they all got left on the table. I just ran for the pub.

As soon as I stepped down, I thought 'never again'. It was as painful as science presentations which I am well used to now, but that used to terrify me. When all you can hope for is a poker face. But this morning, I am more philosophical and I think I would embrace the opportunity to read some newer work. I have already begun to detatch from the anthology poems, mainly because they are older, or should I say earlier, and therefore are not typical of what I am writing now. It is a brilliant learning curve and while sat in the pub after I had the beginnings of a new idea, so inspiring were the friends that came to support me, and the other poets reading last night.

No More Sleeps

Just a quick note to self: think of the words, think of the words, think of the words.

I perhaps should have thought twice about printing poems on brown paper but they looked nice in my very bright office. Now I wonder if I'll be able to read them come this evening. They are, however, on some very pretty postcards. I'm really looking forward to seeing the publicity postcards. Hopefully get to bring a few away for family, posterity etc.

The butterflies have taken residence again. But only little ones. No atlas moths here.

I can just see everyone with their books for sale, and their long list of publications, exciting poems and dynamic reading...at some point I will then be invited to take the mic. Hmmm.

Anyway, T minus one hour. Should really be getting ready and having a drink.

One Sleep

It's one day now until the Flax launch of 'The Crowd Without'. I'm going to remember Carol Ann's advice and just think of the words. But while I think about them, I would also like them to look nice. How does one type out their poems for a reading? Do people mainly type or do they write them by hand? Is this an excuse to buy a new pencil or some new paper? I have a tendency to laminate things whenever I get the chance, so this could be an option. I just don't know. It strikes me that I have not done my research. I don't have any collections yet so I can't read from my own book as I am sure the others will do. Maybe I should put them inside a poetry notebook or a nice card? So that I am not stood with a floppy bit of paper looking inadequate. There seems to be no guidance on this, anywhere. However, this is a really good opportunity to take a trip to Borders Deepdale and look around for some inspiration, part with some cash and pass the time before the one sleep that will bring tomorrow round. How exciting.